bloody hell.
i feel so shitty.
so freaking disappointed in myself.
i just can't run.
as in, since after my knee injury that day.
my knee is just not as strong as it was before.
i can't sprint as fast as i used to.
and its so saddening.
heck. let's not even talk abt sprint.
i can't even stride properly.
i feel so... useless.
and hopeless.

let's take last training as an example.
we were told to run 6 rounds for warm-up.
and i only completed 4.
my knee felt so weak.
going to the physio therapist didn't help either.
she said 'rest well. it will heal in abt 2 weeks'
'go easy on yourself'
and that's one thing i can't do.
how can i?
when my other team mates are running and giving all they've got.
and when i just sit down there watching?

there's training tmr.
i swear to myself.
i'm going to give it all i've got.
even if it kills me.
cos if i don't
then i really don't deserve this last chance.